The doctors are back to criticize the voluptuousness of your pants. Turn your head and cough, but try not to choke unless you really want to.

This show opens positively with notions of resolutions, self-improvement, and the new year that began a third of a year ago. Dr. Tom shares the enthusiasm and wonderment of being voluntarily abducted and deposited into a cultural re-education camp filled with valuable, enriching experiences such as mining for coal, circumcision, severing fingers, and more circumcision. But it’s all valuable because it’s different.

Then Dr. Chris gets a steaming load off his chest after learning that instructional cooking on the internet is really just self-promoting, misleading bullshit with little to no value for a neophyte learning the culinary ropes. That and there isn’t even any nudity involved. Spurred by his passionate, fiery speech, Dr. Josh shares a few ideas in solidarity, formulating an idea for a new cooking show that’s sure to give these click-baity, uppity Karens just what they deserve.

And in an unending mission to overwhelm with variety, we start up a new listener Q+A segment to find out what gapes YOUR intellectual buttholes and answer all sorts of questions related to popping pimples, popping erections, and popping holes in the space-time continuum.

Closing out the show, Dr. Chris reveals he’s received a piece of mail from none other than Dr. Jacoby, but since he wouldn’t disclose just what the message said in front of his loyal listeners, something might be rotten in Denmark. Consider our intellectual buttholes gaped in our soft, voluptuous pants… and Squizzfingers on high alert.

Submit Your Questions to the Doctors Here

Click Here to Overwhelm Your Significant Other with Dildo Variety

Garbage Uppity Karen Cooking Site

“Theme for Harold (var. 3)” and other songs by
Kevin MacLeod (
Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 3.0

Aural Malpractice Episode 0011: Not For The Living